March 27, 2014

Unexplained Hollowness

Near the end of September each year I get this feeling of loss.  There is an unexplained hollowness inside me. For the longest time I could not understand why.

My medical problems as of late have caused those feelings to be even worse.  I sat down last night and mourned my lack of being able to go fishing because of my knee and back problems over a couple beers.

It wasn't just the fishing I miss.  I missed the December scouting trips.  I miss the virgin snow.

The outdoors serves as a battery charger for my soul.  I have been bashful about testing my knee and back for fear of re- injuring them.

I have decided to go fishing tomorrow and dam the consequences. I do not want to risk not seeing the new pine cones budding.

My life would be quite hollow if I could not see the first blossoms on my favorite plum tree grove and smell it's amazing aroma.

I don't know what I would do if the door to the outdoors was ever closed for me.  I would wither away and cease to exist.

"Many men go fishing all of their lives without knowing that it is not fish they are after."

 - Henry David Thoreau


  1. I completely understand the sentiments expressed in this post. I've spent lots of time outdoors photographing birds and wildlife. I'm now retired and have reached a point where physical considerations sometimes limit my activities. The only remedy I've found for those times is to write, print photos, or engage in some other creative activity.

  2. I'm with you Len. Haven't been out in 2 years due to a heart problem!